Why Couples Therapy?

In order for a relationship to succeed you need to work on it every day. Sometimes communication problems develop which can make this hard. This can be caused by past resentments, unmet expectations, mistakes made by one or both people in the relationship. My role as a couples therapist is to repair the communication and get both partners to work together for the relationship instead of against each other.

How it works

In couples therapy, the focus of treatment isn't just one person, it is the couple itself. The therapy is brief, solution-focused and specific, with attainable therapeutic goals. In the first session the issues are explored and then goals are set. These goals are worked on and monitored as we go forward. In a short amount of time sessions are usually moved to every other week to allow you to learn work out conflicts and issues with less input from me.

As we progress my office will become a safe haven, where problems can be discussed without fear of pain, judgment or retribution. In my office you will learn a better way to express your needs and hurts with your partner. By using specific interventions and techniques, hurtful and destructive patterns in the relationship are changed to create a stronger, more open and meaningful relationship.


Situations where couples therapy can be helpful:
  • Communication is breaking down
  • There is diminished sexual desire and activity level
  • You find that you are replaying old arguments and resurrecting old hurts
  • You are finding yourself feeling resentment and contempt for your mate most of the time
  • One or both of you are having an affair
  • Money seems to be a source of conflict frequently
  • You feel that you are being suffocated by the relationship
  • It feels easier to avoid talking about issues
  • You seem to be fighting about your children all the time
  • Infertility issues are tearing the relationship apart
  • You are worried he/she doesn't care about you anymore
  • You are finding yourself worrying that he/she is cheating

The Results

In couples therapy you will learn to identify negative patterns that are getting in the way of the relationship and friendship you once felt. We will work on how the two of you can stop blaming each other so you can work through your problems without creating new hurts and resentments. You will learn how recognize and then to avoid power struggles. I will demonstrate and model healthy ways to communicate and relate to each other, which will strengthen the quality of your relationship



For more information

Copyright 2010 Barry Herbach, LCSW